resolutions – Beyond 20 Something

I’m feeling 2022

If you read that title as 20-22 to the tune of 22 by Taylor Swift, congrats, you win.

You don’t actually win something, sorry, I just love a good Taylor Swift pun.

Almost as much as I love setting resolutions in the new year.

Do I always stick to these resolutions, not always. There’s just something about a new start and new goals to get the year started on the right foot.

Setting goals does not have to be something done specifically in the new year, but if the new year is the thing you need to get started on something you’ve always wanted to do, then so be it.

Personally, I love the idea of having a clean start to something, and new years is the perfect time to start something new.

In the last couple of years I also started setting a word for the year.

In 2019 I set my word of the year as “pursue” which helped remind me to pursue my dream of writing a book. It reminded me in those moments of where I had no motivation to push on towards pursuing my dreams. Honestly, 2019 was my favorite year in recent memory.

This year I set my word as “present” to really focus on being present with my family as we grew closer to growing our family, and to really be present in the first six months of his life.

This year was hard, I go back and forth on how I actually feel about it.

If I had to be honest, the first six months sucked.

I spent more time during those six months crying than I did in any other year of my life.

My family spent the first few months working with our sweet dog Marlo to help her through her health struggles. We payed extra close attention to her and her needs. I spent many nights cuddled up next to her while she was sleeping whispering things to her. Begging her to stay until the new baby came, to telling her that we were ok, that I didn’t want her to struggle anymore and if she needed to go it was ok.

She told us it was time to go on March 1st.

A week later I was met with a pretty hard situation that took up the next three months.

This situation was met with anxiety, depression, anger, hurt, regret, and negativity.

I saw so many things in my life take a hit. I found myself shutting down because it was easier than facing any sort of emotion.

June became a month of hope.

June provided me with rest, sunshine, family time, and my sweet baby boy Maxwell.

Maxwell was exactly what my family needed, he was exactly what I needed.

It was hard at first.

One day after he was born we found out that he had some pretty bad Jaundice, which had him in a little tank for 24 hours.

We also found out that my kidney levels were pretty bad, I spent the day after he was born getting 30 different tubes of blood drawn, CT scan’s, ultrasounds, and every bit of worst case scenario you could imagine.

We ended up leaving the hospital after four days.

I told the hospital that I had to get back to my oldest son and that I would continue my tests at home.

Life with two kids was hard at first, but honestly it’s been the biggest blessing I could ever imagine.

Maxwell is sweet, strong, curious, talkative, and loving.

He is the best thing that came out of this year hands down.

The rest of the year went by so incredibly fast, maybe that’s what having a baby does.

I really found my confidence after having Max.

I began working out again and finding my strength.

I discovered a style that made me confident.

I worked through hard situations with grace and strength and came out better.

I think that’s the most important thing we can do at the end of every year.

Look back on the previous year, truly recognize what went wrong, what went right, and what we could have done better.

We also need to praise ourself when it’s due.

Recognize when we grew.

Recognize that what we went through might have been hard, but that we worked so hard to get through it.

Meet the end of the year praising ourselves.

Give thanks for the version of us that entered the year and the version that meets us in our reflection at the end of it.

Looking at the new year, I find myself hopeful.

I find myself clear on my goals and what I want from the new year.

And that is to just be.

Be present, be powerful, be kind, be patient, be aware, be confident.

Just to be the best version of myself.

It may seem weird, but it came to me in the shower the other night.

My word for this year is “be” with the idea that I have no desired path for this year other than to just be whatever it brings.

This word made me more mindful of my resolutions for this year as well.

Resolutions that were manageable and reasonable, so that I could still be whatever version of myself that this year required.

I want to read more, specifically one book every month.

The first seven of those books being the Harry Potter series.

I have always wished that I had read these books growing up and constantly find myself saying “this will be the year I start reading them.” I figured why not start it now. The other five months will consist of whatever books I decide to read.

I want to journal.

I have always hoped that I could be the person who journaled, but never made the time to do so. I will be adding it into my daily routine so that I can reflect back on my thoughts and feelings after they pass.

I want to keep blogging.

I have already stated this in my previous post, but stating it again will help remind me of the desire I have to continue to blog throughout the year. Blogging is therapeutic to me. It helps me process my thoughts. I have also met some awesome people through it and have had people reach out to me after reading a post relating to the words I’ve typed.

I want to continue to be healthy and fit.

While the specifics of this goal remain private, because this is my own personal journey, I want to continue to workout and meet that with better eating habits. I have fallen in love with my peloton strength classes, bike classes, and treadmill classes. These workouts give me confidence and strength while also being fun. Fun is the most important part honestly.

Those are it, those are the four goals I have set for this year.

While four may not seem like a lot, they are four goals that I can focus on.

Why overload myself with too many goals, when I can find four that I want to stick with.

I’m really looking forward to 2022.

I am looking forward to hopefully returning to more of a normal life.

To Maxwell turning 1 and Ian starting kindergarten.

To finishing off the school year at a job where I finally feel like I belong.

To new beginnings and adventures with Jason.

To making memories with my family.

I picked this title because I truly am feeling the new year.

It’s the first time in a while that I truly do feel hopeful and optomistic.

I hope this year brings you happiness.

I hope that if you find yourself in a tough situation, that you can come out stronger.

I hope that you meet your resolutions with stride, and that you find purpose in something.

And I hope Taylor Swift gives us Speak Now and 1989 Taylor’s version.

Cheers to 2022.

❤

2018 Resolutions Review

I’m posting my resolutions reflection post a little early this year.

You’ll find out why tomorrow.

For the last two years I’ve written New Years Resolutions and try my hardest to accomplish them.

I’ve found that writing them and putting them out into the universe holds me accountable.

It reminds me every day of the things I sat out to pursue for the upcoming year.

I made some tough ones last year, but worked so hard to try and make them happen.

2018 New Years Resolutions.

Run another half marathon– This one was hard. I trained my butt off. I worked hard all winter, spring, and summer. I really wanted to run this half marathon near Portland on the fourth of July. I started out so fast and was really pumped for the race. It wasn’t until mile 7 or so when I started getting dizzy. I really thought about quitting, and honestly, I probably should have. I finished along side some strangers who passed me along to my sister and husband to finish. I spent the next hour in a medical tent. It definitely wasn’t my favorite experience of the year, but it made me really appreciate how hard I worked. It made me realize that no matter how hard you try and prepare for something, it might not always work out. And that’s ok.

Take a road trip- I accomplished this one during March of this last year. My little family took a road trip to Seattle. We got a cute little house and spent the weekend exploring the city. It was so much fun and Ian did so well experiencing new things. It turned out that would be the first of three times I would visit Seattle this year, and I loved every single trip.

Watch 52 Movies- Ok…I suck at watching movies…we all know this now. It turns out that I don’t have as much time as I thought I did to watch 52 new movies. In fact, I think I might have only watched 20 or less. I definitely found some new favorites, but also found that there were others things I would rather be doing. Some of the ones I really enjoyed were; When Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, Top Gun, and Dead Poets Society. My favorite though, was Shawshank Redemption, if you haven’t seen it you need to!

Work on my patience- This one is hard. How do you track ones patience? I’ve found that when I’m aware of what’s going on, I’m better with my patience. But in the heat of the moment I definitely air on the side of impatient.

Learn something new- Here’s where we get a little out there. This resolution kept nagging me all year. “Megan….you better be learning something new!” Honestly I kept trying to force myself to learn something and it never stuck. It’s when I randomly stumbled down a horoscope website that I started researching more and more into my horoscope. And not just that, different signs such as your moon and sun sign, along with your birth chart. In no way do I live by any of this, I just decided to start looking into it all and I think it’s insanely accurate and fascinating.

Daily Gratitude- If I had to grade myself on daily gratitude I’d give myself a C. I’m 50/50 when it comes to writing down things I’m thankful for. Not that I’m not grateful for things, I just have a hard time taking the time to write it all down.

Save Money- Again, I would give myself a C for this one. Did I save money? Kind of. Did I go crazy and buy random crap that I didn’t need? Not really.

Be Spontaneous- This one is the resolution that I’m the most proud of. I had been wanting to visit my best friend in Missouri since she moved a few years back. But you see..I hate flying. Just the thought of it terrifies me. I was having a bad couple of days and really just needed something good to happen. I texted my husband, looked at her work schedule, and next thing you know I’m booking a flight to St. Louis. Probably one of my top three moments of the year and one of my favorite decisions.

Start to write my book- See tomorrow’s post.

Don’t be so hard on myself- This will forever be a work in progress for me. I tend to be a people pleaser, and want to make everyone happy. I tend to be hard on myself if people aren’t happy with me. Which is so messed up if you think about it. Just because someone else has randomly decided that they are upset with me or don’t like me, unless I have done something wrong, that’s their issue not mine. This was a constant struggle all year and will be for awhile. But i’m trying.

2018 was a great. Just like the previous years.

But next year needs to be different.

Next year will be different.

It’s the year I turn 29.

The last year before 30.

It’s going to be a big one.

❤

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I suck at watching movies

Hi I’m Megan and I suck at watching movies.

There I’ve said it.

Phew..

I feel like a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders.

Seriously though.

I suck at watching movies.

I’ve seen a good amount of movies in my lifetime, but not a lot.

My family would always watch movies together when I was growing up and when I was in middle school I would go out with my friends and see whatever movie was popular at the time.

But I never saw those movies.

You know those movies.

The ones that leave you tearing up in your seat.

The ones you have nightmares about.

The ones that leave you with the feeling to watch it over and over again.

I just haven’t seen them.

In all honesty I’ve seen a bunch of movies, I just felt like I was missing out.

I would have much rather watched television shows on Netflix then movies any day.

It just didn’t sound like fun to me at the time.

I saw the idea a month or so ago on Facebook.

Someone was going to watch a movie a week for 52 weeks, the length of one full year.

It sounded like a challenge.

I let the idea sit with me for a few days.

What movies would I maybe want to watch?

What movies I might not reach for right away, but people have suggested to me before?

I also wanted to do some research.

I found “movies you must watch before you’re 30″ lists on Pinterest and googled some of the great movies of the last few decades.

I really wanted to make this diverse.

I wanted as many genres as I could.

I even asked the people in my life what movies were important to them.

Jason was eager to jump on board and help me get some ideas.

My mom and dad gave me so many movie titles that I might make another list.

And my brother criticized some of my choices as he does, but he gave me some great ideas as well. Movies I would have never thought of watching.

This list might not seem perfect, but it’s not meant to be.

It wont be a list full of the movies that defined our generation, or the movies that won the most Oscars. These are movies that I felt were important to watch.

Movies that I wanted to watch, and movies that my family suggested.

Every weekend I’m going to stay up a little late and watch a movie that I’ll choose at random.

So far I’ve watched three movies.

At the end of every month I might even write a little piece reviewing the movies I watched for that month.

Who knows.

This is my project and my rules.

I’ll figure it out as it goes.

52 Movies for 52 Weeks.

Big Hero 6
A League of Their Own
Girls Just Wanna Have Fun
Animal House
Parenthood
The Big Lebowski
The Replacements
Fight Club
Footloose
Good Will Hunting
Dead Poets Society
Apollo 13
In Bruges
The Graduate
Flashdance
Pulp Fiction
The Departed
Inglorious Bastards
Top Gun
E.T
Now and Then
Time Travelers Wife
The Usual Suspects
One Flew Over the Cuckoos Nest
Steal Magnolias
Manhattan
Rent
Newsies
The Producers
Officer and a Gentleman
The Holiday
When Harry Met Sally
Breakfast at Tiffanys
Moulon Rouge
Pretty Woman
Notting Hill
Ghost
Silver Linings Playbook
Father of the Brude
Sleepless in Seattle
You’ve Got Mail
Say Anything
The Princess Bride
About a Boy
Close Encounters of the Third Kind
Inception
Guardians of the Galaxy
A Few Good Men
Silence of the Lambs
The Italian Job
The Shining
Shawshank Redemption.

I challenge you to watch a new movie.

Open yourself up to the experience.

❤

2018 Resolutions

Here it is.

The last day of Blog to 2018.

20 days of writing straight.

It’s been fun, hard, and challenging.

It has forced me to write when I don’t like the topic or am not in the mood to write. Putting me outside of my comfort zone and telling me that I don’t need to be in the mood to write. That I don’t need to have something life changing happen to write. That I can write no matter what.

I’m so incredibly proud of myself.

It might not seem like a huge deal but it is to me, and that’s all that matters.

I owe myself a piece of cake.

I want to keep writing in 2018, keep improving my posts and growing my followers. 83 might not seem like a lot but it’s so awesome to me.

I’ve never made New Year resolutions before until last year. Actually taking the time to write them down and share them with others made me aware of them. They were always there in my mind, giving me something to work for.

I loved it so much that I decided to do it again for 2018.

I aspire to tackle these goals like I did in 2017.

Run another half marathon. This one makes me nervous, running 13.1 miles when the most I’ve run since having Ian is six. I love running and I want to continue it in 2018. Setting this goal of running another half marathon again will keep me to training and give me something to train for. I just keep reminding myself, you’ve done a marathon Megan, you can do another half.
Take a road trip. This goal doesn’t need to be anything crazy, it could be a trip to a new town a couple of hours away. I just want to go load up the car, put on some good music, and drive. When Jason and I drove up to Seattle for the Mariners game we really got to enjoy each others company. We talked about anything and everything, listened to an episode of my favorite fantasy football podcast, and talked about my new Game of Thrones obsession. Taking a road trip means I get to go somewhere with my family and make a new memory, I’m totally down.
Watch 52 movies. Yes I know, 52 seems oddly specific, but I have a reason. I, Megan, have never seen The Princess Bride or Fight Club. I actually haven’t seen a lot of movies. If you can think of a movie that everyone should watch at some point in their life chances are I’ve never seen it. I got the idea to watch a new movie every week for the year, hence 52 movies. I started to work on creating a list and asked my husband, parents, and brother. People that I knew would give me lots of suggestions. I now have a list of 52 movies and am so excited to get to watch them I think I’m just going to start. No need to limit myself to one a week. Once I finish, I’ll keep going and keep opening myself up to new movies. Don’t worry, there will be a blog post once I’m done.
Work on my patience. I suck at being patient. I honestly don’t have any and I’m completely aware of it. I know I won’t end 2018 living a new life full of patience, but if I can make it better in the slightest I’ll be happy. I just want to be able to handle situations better than I have in the past.
Learn something new. This resolution isn’t specific for a reason, because I don’t know what that something new is yet, but I know I want to learn it. Not necessarily in its fullest but I want to at least start. I could learn a new language, learn how to swim, or driving a stick shift. Anything that I don’t already know how to do is up for grabs.
Daily gratitude. Quite possibly the easiest goal of mine to try and attain. I want to start or finish every day with one thing I’m grateful for. I want to sit for a minute and reflect on the things that make me happy, the things that I’m grateful for. I believe that the smallest task can make a huge difference and put things in perspective or help when I’m having a bad day.
Save money. This goal speaks for itself. There are things Jason and I want to do to our house and trips we want to take one day, having a solid savings is something that will definitely help that. Besides that, I feel as an almost 28 year old that saving money is something I should do. I’m not saying that I want to have this huge savings account and be able to spend it on a crazy trip, but I want to be better about spending and have a substantial savings account.
Be Spontaneous. I am not a spontaneous person, at all. Seriously. I like to have everything planned out. It makes me happy having things planned out and going according to plan. I would just love to be spontaneous one day, say to do something, and just do it. Not to have everything planned out to the last second like I usually do, but to just do it. To let go and just do something because I want to. It might sound crazy to people who are normally spontaneous but I aspire to be that way, even in the slightest.
Start to write a book. It’s one of my life goals to write a book. I have two ideas that have been in my head for a few years and I always go back and fourth between them. I know writing a book is a huge project, that’s why I want to start this year. I want to publish it before I’m 30. It’s crazy saying it out loud, I’ve kept it in my head for so long and on my private Pinterest board without telling anyone. And now I’ve told anyone who reads this. I really don’t care if a million people read it or not. It’s a huge goal of mine and I hope to start it this year.
Don’t be so hard on myself. I’m always so hard on myself, mainly because I’m a perfectionist. If I want to accomplish my resolutions, I know there will be speed bumps along the way. And if I want to make it over those speed bumps, I need to not be so hard on myself. If I make a mistake, learn from it, don’t dwell on it all day. Giving myself some freedom to make mistakes and not be mad at myself for it, can really open up so many doors.

I really did love 2017, and 2016, and 2015. I know that 2018 will follow the trend, because I want it to. If you have a little bit of will power and some determination you really can accomplish those goals or resolutions, and can really change your mindset. I hope 2018 brings us all new experiences, joy, a Dodgers world series trophy, and a Taylor Swift concert. Well..I know I’ll be at the Taylor Swift concert..not sure about you..

❤

2017 Resolutions Review

Oh 2017.

You were quite the year.

I changed jobs, got this awesome little nephew, and watched some important people in my life do some big things.

It was also our first full year with Ian.

Watching him grow up more and more every day has been so much fun.

He started eating solid food, had a bad encounter with peas, started feeding himself, slept in his big boy bed, started sleeping through the night, rolled over crawled, took his first steps, celebrated his first birthday.

This year was full of so many new things.

I made some resolutions last year to give myself some things to work for this year.

Some big some small.

Some were things that could be done in a day.

Others took some time to get in the habit of.

I want to go over the resolutions I made and see how I did.

See if I need to keep these goals for 2018 or make new ones.

I want to sing in the car more. I feel like I accomplished this goal and can keep it going in my daily routine for 2018. Singing in the car has brought me so much simple joy each morning. I’m not talking crazy dance parties, but just singing along to the radio keeps me from getting annoyed with all of the terrible drivers.
I don’t want to overthink and obsess over things. This one will always be kind of a work in progress for me. It’s in my nature to obsess over things, it’s just what I do. When it comes to overthinking I feel like I’ve gotten slightly better, just slightly. This resolution was for one situation particularly and I learned quickly that once I stopped obsessing over it, it took care of itself. Definitely one of the most important lessons I learned from this year.
Put my phone down while eating. This one was super easy once I started. Little goals like this are easy to start and stick with. It just took some self awareness the first few days of putting my phone further away from me while I ate. It’s so easy to just eat and play on your phone and even easier to put it away from you while you eat. Jason and I could talk to each other instead, and now that Ian’s eating we all get to eat together.
I want to keep writing. I’m super proud of myself for this one. When I wrote my resolutions post for last year it was my tenth post, this one I’m writing today is my 56th post. As I’ve said before, this blog was hard for me to start and now I’ve completed a years worth of blog posts. A years worth of putting myself out there and letting others think what they want about it. I got a Facebook message from an old friend after one post and it was seriously the reason that I write. If I can make one person have a positive reaction to my writing then that’s all I need.
I want to stop striving for others approval. I’ll always have a little worry of what other people think of me, I’m not perfect, this will always be a thing. However, I think writing has definitely helped me. I can’t go into a post worrying what others will think of it, or how they’ll react. If I did that, I would never be able to write anything. Trying to please everyone just won’t happen.
I want to go to another Major League Baseball game. In July Jason and I went to a Seattle Mariners game. I’m now at 4 out of 30 for my baseball stadium life goal. It was so much fun, besides getting a terrible sunburn. I’m not quite sure what stadium will be next but I’m excited to find out.
I want to learn that I can’t control everything. This goal goes hand in hand with goal number two. It was really about a specific incident that I was worried about, and trying to control. I found that once I stopped and let life take care of it, it would take care of itself. One of the most important lessons I learned this year.
I want to go to a concert. It’s crazy thinking that when I wrote this goal last year I had no idea who LANY was, let alone that I would be going to their concert. I had Spotify on a random playlist last spring and came across one of their songs and instantly fell in love. I made Jason listen to them and next thing you know were buying tickets to their show in Portland for November. It was such a fun experience. There were so many high school aged kids down on the floor, and everyone in their late twenties sat up above with Jason and I. By far one of the oldest things we’ve ever done was complain about the young kids down on the floor. Even though I was on the eve of my second strep throat diagnosis in a month, it was so much fun. Seriously. Arguably one of the best nights of the year.
I want to dance more. This one has been easily achieved with the help of Ian. We dance in the kitchen together all the time. He’s really shown a love for music, and he does the cutest little wiggle when he hears a song he likes. Seeing the pure joy in his eyes makes me not care how terrible I can dance, if it makes him happy. I’m happy.
Run more. I started running more in the summer and it was the best decision. It was hard to get started, being out of breath and running two minutes slower per mile was discouraging. It made me not want to keep running. Every day was small. I started with two miles and worked my way up to 3. It sounds so silly actually saying it out loud but it was hard. I took a small break and picked it up back in the fall consistently. I remember the day I ran under an eight minute mile, I felt on top of the world. And the day I ran 6 miles, felt like I could do anything. I’ll definitely keep doing this in 2018, and will start with a 10k in January.

2017 was a great year, by far better than I expected. I ended my post last year hoping for a new Taylor Swift album, and I’m pleased to announce that I’m awesome and predicted it. You’re welcome.

❤

Megan’s Month: January 2017

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I really want to do something on my blog where I recap each month and look back at some of my favorite things at the moment. I think looking back at life is fascinating, like Facebook’s “on this day” section, I stalk that religiously. I also have this five year journal where every day you answer the same question for that specific day. So on each February 8th for the last five years you can see how your answers progress and change. Memories are wonderful, I love looking back and getting all sentimental. Especially now that I have a son, I get all mushy and soft, and I want to capture everything. My parents did a great job creating photo albums and making home movies, such a great job that I aspire to do the same for myself in any way I can. That’s what this blog is for, to capture my thoughts and look back at my life at this point and watching how I grow, watching how my writing grows, and watching how my family grows.

January is coming to an end and my second favorite month is upon us! Selfishly it’s because my birthday is in February but who’s keeping track.
This month has been full of routines; Netflix binge sessions, baby cuddles, and working out. I’ve gone from staying home with Ian to going back to work and bringing him to daycare. It’s been challenging, learning something new about being a mom every day, and getting back into my routines at work. Balancing all of the crazy one day at a time. The month has gone by so fast and I have a feeling that’s how 2017 will be as a whole…and parenthood…all of it.

I’ve grown to have much more patience this month, and to not take things so personally. Being a mom seriously gives you some sort of crazy super power. The power to know that things may not go according to plan but that they will work out. I could be running late for work, with baby spit up on my shirt while my coffee’s getting cold..and I know that as long as my family is safe, happy, and healthy it doesn’t matter if my coffee gets cold or not. Such small things that before would ruin my day, but now don’t get to me as easily. They still do…but not as easily as they did before I didn’t have this super power.
If I had to give January a theme..I would say that January was the month of
realizing things.

I have realized how capable I am of getting out of my comfort zone, I have realized that I should try things before I turn them down, and I have realized that nothing is as bad as I think it is. This month was completely different than any other month, I’ve had to go back to “normal” life with a baby by my side and realize that I am 100 percent capable of it.

Some other random things I’ve been in love with this month..

The West Wing

Writing in my journal before I go to bed

La La Land

Color coordinating the apps on my phone

My gorgeous planner my brother gave me for Christmas

Grande Triple Shot Iced Vanilla Lattes from Starbucks

Baby cuddles

Not avoiding certain roads while driving because they intimidate me

Watching old romantic comedies on TV

Wearing this beautiful ring on my thumb that I stole from my sister

Listening to more podcasts

This month really was full of new things, then again, every day as a new mom is. I’ve come to realize how capable I am of different things. Things that I would have second guessed a few months ago come quickly to me now. I am quick to realize that regardless of what it is, I need to do what’s best for me and what’s best for my family and that’s all that matters.
I’ve also tried to focus on finding ten or fifteen minutes a night to just write and unwind. Whatever’s on my mind goes down in my journal and it helps me relax right before bed, that and old friends episodes on TV. If I could give anyone one piece of advice from this month, something to try and focus on for February it would be realizing what you need.
Realize what makes you happy and what makes you feel better. If writing in your journal and getting Starbucks makes you happy..DO IT!

If you want to go get a blizzard and not feel bad about not working out before..DO IT.

If you want to take a bubble bath while drinking wine out of a mug…DO IT.

If you want to binge watching trashy reality makes you happy..DO IT.

Do whatever makes you happy and whatever is going to make you the best version of yourself.

I hope your February is better than January and that every day brings you a new memory. A memory that you can look back on in a month, a year, or ten years and think about how great life was at that very moment. Cheers to February and turning 27 in eight days!

Quote of the month:
“What would life be if we had no courage to attempt anything?”- Vincent Van Gogh

❤

Cheers to 2017

makeithappen

I have always been fascinated with New Years Eve, maybe not the holiday specifically but the idea of a fresh start. I loved ending the year with the best intentions on making the next year better than the last. Just the thought of a brand new year..an opportunity to do things differently..a chance to do something new..and a time to make goals…I love it. In the past I have made resolutions like everyone else..

Be healthier.

Exercise more.

Eat less junk food.

All health and fitness related because I figured that’s what a resolution was supposed to be. They were all resolutions that I wouldn’t stick to for more than a month or so and I was back to chugging a soda and sitting on the couch instead of going for a run.

This year I wanted to make better resolutions. Things that I could control more, and things that would better me in some way or were a reflection of my goals in life. I’ve been brainstorming my resolutions for a few months now and I am pretty happy with them. All things that I believe at this time next year I will look back on and be able to check them off as completed. Despite what I may believe sometimes, I am clearly not perfect. I know some things won’t get completed..and that’s what 2018 is for. There will always be an opportunity for more resolutions.

I want to sing in the car more. Not because I want to show the car next to me that I can turn into Drake in the blink of an eye..or that I know the lyrics to almost any song..but because singing in the car makes me happy. When I sing in the car I don’t yell at cars for being stupid or get super impatient right away. I used to sing in the car with my sister every day when we commuted to school for 30 minutes. It was the highlight of my day and I will always cherish it. I believe that if I sing in the car more it will give me a little bit of joy each day.
I don’t want to overthink and obsess over things. This one will be the hardest by far, and I am aware of that. I think that is half of the battle, knowing what my hardest resolution will be. I tend to overthink almost every situation in life and obsess over every little detail. When in reality that takes me away from living a better life. I spend so much time obsessing over things that I don’t have time to do anything else. I know this will make me happier and give me more time in the day to do other things.
Put my phone down while eating. I didn’t realize this would be a resolution until I was eating dinner with my husband the other night at home. I looked up from my phone and noticed that we were both eating dinner and staring at our phones instead of enjoying our food and each others company. Eating is a time when you can really sit and enjoy your meal and your company, whether it’s with yourself or another person. Sitting by myself eating gives me 10 minutes of peace and quiet and 10 minutes of eating dinner with my husband gives us an opportunity to talk about our days or plans for the weekend. Disconnecting for those few minutes won’t kill me.
I want to keep writing. This was so hard for me to even begin doing. Writing what’s going on in my mind and putting it out for other people to see and judge. It may seem small to others but it was a huge step for me and one that I am super proud of. I am so proud of what my little corner of the internet has become and I don’t want to stop doing it in 2017.
I want to stop striving for others approval. I worry what others think of me a lot. People’s opinions are pointless, if they like me awesome! If they don’t, I shouldn’t have to sit there and worry how to fix it and how to live up to their standards. Once again, something that may be easy for others but is hard for me. I always go back to a great piece of advice my best friend gave me, “those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.”
I want to go to another Major League Baseball game. Only a few people know my lifetime goal, and that is to go to every major league baseball stadium, buy a hat, and watch a game. It’s a goal that gets me to travel more, and explore cities I might not originally go to. I also fell in love with the sport of baseball and the history of it thanks to my dad. Each stadium has so many stories attached to it and I would love to explore every one. So far I have been to three. Dodger stadium my one true love, Oakland Coliseum to watch my husbands favorite team the A’s, and Yankee Stadium with my husband on our honeymoon to watch the Yankees play the Red Soxs under the lights. I don’t care what game I see, I just want to add one more to my list and collect more hats.
I want to learn that I can’t control everything. This goal kind of goes with goals number 2 and 5. I try so hard to control every little thing and get upset when I can’t. I guess I just feel more comfortable when I know what’s going on, and I think the best way of knowing what’s going on is being able to control everything. I guess I need to get more comfortable with chaos and letting things just happen. Having a newborn will help that, and it already has.
I want to go to a concert. I love going to concerts, even though I have only been to a few I love going to them. From my first concert at 11 (thanks for suffering through O-TOWN with us dad) to the Hunter Hayes concert my husband took me to this last summer. They were all so much fun. Going along with my last goal of enjoying the chaos, I think concerts give you just that. Lots of people, loud music that you love, and everyone just dancing and not caring what anyone else is doing. I love the carefree attitude that comes along with going to concerts and I would love to be able to enjoy that for a night.
Dance more. Again, this goes with my previous goal. Let me first say that in no way can I dance, at all, I’m like the drunk uncle at a wedding dancing to Party in the U.S.A. I just love being able to dance along to your favorite song while cleaning the house or cooking dinner. I used to do it all the time and it made me feel as if I had no other worry in the world and I would love to do it more.
Run more. Running is by far my favorite thing ever, next to my family. I have been running competitively since I was 12. Running after college has been one of the harder things I have had to figure out in life and I am still trying to figure it out. It was pretty hard trying to run while I was pregnant. I would get so discouraged because I wasn’t running the paces I did before and it was frustrating. I need to do it more. It is my way to let things go, be by myself, and push myself to do more.

I hope 2017 brings me half of the joy that 2016 brought me. I hope I can reach most if not all of my goals and if I don’t I hope I have the opportunity to tackle them the year after. I hope it’s full of lots of smiles and love from my little boy, adventures with my amazing husband and family, and a new Taylor Swift album.

❤