10 things for people to remember in their late twenties.

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I’m quickly approaching it.

My 30’s.

It’s so close but at times still feels so far away.

I can’t believe that in two years I’ll put my twenties behind me.

My college years.

Young adulthood.

Falling in love.

Becoming a mom.

This shit moves fast people.

Life is crazy that ways.

One day you’re counting down the days till you’re 21.

The next you’re complaining about that weird noise your bones make when you walk down the stairs.

The older you get in your twenties the more you wonder.

Am I doing this right?

And if not, why isn’t there some sort of rule book for this?

As someone who has almost two years left of being a twenty something..

(Cue heavy breathing and panicking)

I feel like I have a place to share with the world my experiences.

The things that I find so important to remember as you approach the later end of your twenties.

So here you have it folks,

10 things for people to remember in their late twenties.

  1. It’s ok to not have anything to do on a Friday night. You’re not a complete loser if you aren’t out at a club every Friday and Saturday night. The importance of your life doesn’t matter on how many shots you can take at a club or how many random phone numbers you can get. Going out is fine and all, but don’t bring yourself down by comparing your social calendars to those of whoever you follow on Instagram.
  2. Eat that doughnut. I should start by saying don’t eat all of the donuts, don’t go crazy or anything, but you don’t always have to turn them down.I always hear people saying “I shouldn’t” when getting offered sweets, but why shouldn’t you? Yes, don’t have a doughnut every day but if it’s Friday and you’ve had a long week, take that frickin doughnut. Live a little. You have the rest of your life to deprive yourself of donuts.
  3. Enjoy your birthday. Growing up I remember people telling me to enjoy my 21st birthday, because after that they start going downhill. But they don’t have to. You’re the judge of how you treat your birthday. Remember when you were growing up and you were so excited for your birthday almost as much as Christmas. All you wanted was the attention, balloons, presents, and cake. Your birthday was your day. Why does it have to stop. Approach each birthday with as much joy and excitement as you did when you were growing up, instead of another year older. Everyone enjoys to be happy on their birthday.
  4. Make time for your friends. This is probably the one I wish someone would have told me about. I met my best friends in college, and I thought that it would be easy, keeping in touch with them. There’s Facebook and all of that, so of course it’d be easy. But I was so incredibly wrong. You have to initiate it. You have to make the plans and schedule regular time to see them. You get busy in your late twenties, with family, work, and catching up on sleep, it’s easy to forget to talk to your friend for a day or two. Don’t let them slip away, make that time.
  5. Get rid of those negative people. If you don’t like someone, you don’t have to act as if you do. If they’ve done nothing but tear you down, take them out of your life. Look around and see if anyone in your life makes you feel like a lesser version of yourself. If they do, guess what? They don’t deserve you.
  6. Find something you love to do. For me, it’s this blog. Writing gives me something that is solely mine. This space, my words, the stories I tell, they’re mine. I started this blog at a time in my life when I knew I wanted something that was just for me. Something that I could use to express myself and fill my time. Something that I looked forward to doing. Find something that sets your soul on fire and run with it, and never look back.
  7. Like what you like. I was so worried of what people in college thought of me. I would listen to the “cool” music on my ipod in the library in hopes that someone would hear it. I wanted to be liked by everyone so badly that I would just take interest in what everyone else did. It wasn’t until second semester of my senior year when I took my creative writing class, because I wanted to, that I realized you can literally like whatever you want. If you want to take a writing class and no one else you know takes it, then do it. If you love Drake but also Van Morrison, who cares? Like whatever you want, it makes you who you are.
  8. Let yourself fall in love. Unless you met the love of your life when you were in High School, there’s a good chance you’re going to fall in love in your twenties. Let yourself do it. Don’t worry about their age or what they do for a living. Don’t worry about how you met or that none of your friends know them. Let yourself fall, completely without a safety net. Don’t hold back in anything you do, especially love. You might get hurt, and that’s ok, it’s part of the process.
  9. You might not have your dream job right away. You know that job you dreamed of when you were growing up? That job you always wanted or worked your butt off for in college? Just know, that it might not come right away. If it does, congratulations, I envy you. But if you’re like the rest of us, you won’t find your perfect job straight out of college. Sometimes it takes a few times to get it right. It might not be the job that you thought you would be doing growing up. If it’s that job that you don’t dread going to every day, that job that gives you so much purpose and you can fully say you’re happy with, that’s ok. Don’t stress about it too much early on, it’ll happen.
  10. Yon don’t have to be who they want you to be. This one is the most important. There’s this stigma about being a twenty something, especially if you’re in your late twenties. Everywhere you look you see different images of what your life should be like at that age, don’t let that decide who you are. If you’re a married mother of one, awesome. If you live with your cat and your longest relationship is with your How I Met Your Mother binge session that’s ok too. You don’t have to be who they want you to be, you don’t have to have it all figured out. I thought growing up that at this age you were supposed to know everything and have life figured out. I think my life is pretty great, but I don’t by any means have everything figured out. This is your time to find it, to find who you’re going to be.

Your twenties are your time.

Your time to discover who you are.

Your time to make mistakes, friends, and memories.

Your time to not know what in the world you’re doing and knowing that that’s ok.

That you don’t have to have it all figured out.

If you spend your Friday nights writing for your blog discovering a new love for Bruce Springsteen that’s perfectly ok.

In the end were all going through different things and learning lessons for ourselves.

You make the rules for your late twenties are going to go.

No one else.

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Things I learned in College.

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How did it go by so fast?

June 2017 is quickly approaching, and it will mark 5 years since I graduated college.

Excuse me while I cry in the corner for a minute ..

College was a lot at first. I started out at a private christian college up in Portland with my sister.

After a few short months of memories that I will always cherish, and some things that weren’t as much fun, we were off to Community College to try and get our next steps figured out. We completed two terms there and continued running when the opportunity came to attend Western Oregon University. We jumped on that train real fast.

I loved Western. I loved the people I met, the memories I made, the walks to and from the track, everything about that place helped shaped me into the person I am today.

It’s crazy thinking about the person I was when I started College and the person I am now. I went through college not being able to imagine my life without it.  I thought the real world was some fake thing that would never actually happen until I was dropped into it without a parachute.

You learn things in college.

Obviously.

But a majority of the things you don’t even realize you’ve learned until years have passed. I know quite a bit of people who are in college, or who will be attending in the next few years and I want them to have the best experiences. I want them to make mistakes, learn from them, and make some more.

You won’t learn until you make mistakes and grow.

At least that’s how I see it.

I’ve compiled a list of 14 things I learned in college. These are just 14 out of the many that I learned. I believe everyone will have their own memories, mistakes, and lessons that they go through. These are just some of mine.

  1. Hide out in the library- Seriously. There will be projects that take so much time and sanity from you that you will need an escape. You will need a space to just lay everything out and look at it. Figure it out and get it done. I ended up going to the library just to people watch and relax sometimes. We had these giant floor to ceiling windows that I loved.  I grabbed a coffee, sat in a chair and just people watched.
  2. Don’t force friendships- I tried so hard to get this one girl to like me. She had no reason to dislike me as much as she did and yet she still did. It bothered me. I wanted so bad to fix it. I hated walking around knowing that someone thought the worst of me. It wasn’t until the day she told me “I’ll put up with you here, but I’m not your friend and I’ll never be” that it finally hit me. Some people won’t like you..and it’s their problem not yours.
  3. Dance- I am an awful dancer, I have lots of people that can tell you that, but I love it. I loved being out with my friends and singing along to the music as loud as we could and just dancing. It probably wasn’t dancing, I think I just jumped up and down until I couldn’t feel my feet anymore. In those moments I forgot everything that was going on and only cared about my friends and the music.
  4. Have at least one best friend of the opposite sex- I adore this person. We hardly talk anymore and I’m not sure if he reads these things but I will always cherish his friendship. At first I thought he was the most annoying person ever and I probably told him I hated him multiple times a day. I can’t quite remember how we became close but I ended up being able to talk to him about anything and everything. It’s so good to get another perspective. If you’re having boy problems and go to all of your girlfriends they will give you a lot of the same advice. If you go to a boy, he will most likely tell you how it is. He won’t sugar anything and he will always look out for you.
  5. Take lots of pictures- This one is so incredibly important. Take as many pictures of anything and everything that you can.
  6.  Register for a class that you normally wouldn’t- My favorite classes at Western were all ones that I didn’t plan on registering for; Theatre Arts, Coaching Youth Sports, and Creative Writing. Creative Writing was probably my favorite. I didn’t know anyone, I was terrified, and I had no idea what I was doing. I wanted to quit once I found out that we had to write a short story and read it to the entire class. We had to let them critique it out loud. Meanwhile you had to sit at your desk and just take it without defending yourself. It got me to get outside of my comfort zone, to try new things, and to be open to criticism. My story ended up being the one piece of work I was the most proud of in College.
  7. Be present- This one seems obvious but sometimes we need a reminder to pay attention. People need to be present in their lives and make memories. Never miss a good opportunity to laugh so hard you cry, or those late night conversations about life and love because you’re glued to your phone.
  8. Don’t be afraid to take a risk- This can be anything. Taking a risk in the classroom, joining a new club, introducing yourself to someone new, anything. You will always regret those opportunities you didn’t take.
  9. Procrastinate- This might be weird. I’m not saying to avoid all of your school work and put everything off until you’re going crazy because you have a 12 page essay due the next day and you haven’t even picked a topic. Don’t do that, but some things I remember the most involve being up till 2 in the morning drinking my body weight in coffee. Everyone should experience those late nights, endless amounts of caffeine and laughing because you’re so stressed out. It’s part of the experience.
  10. Don’t give your trust out- Be cautious of who you trust. Some people will seem like they have the best intentions when all they care about is themselves. Don’t be skeptical of everyone you meet, just be careful of who you put your trust in.
  11. Find your true friends- I had five true friends by the time I graduated. I had lots of friends, but only a few people I would do anything for. These people are your support team. They will be there when you’re alone and scared, when you have a hilarious story to tell, or when you need advice. They will love you unconditionally and be there for you the second you need them. They are your lifelines.
  12. Don’t waste your time trying to be what others want you to be- This one’s tough. It might take you 4 years to learn. You might not even realize that you’re too busy trying to impress everyone that you’ve lost yourself. If everyone’s at a party and you only want to go because you’re afraid of what they’ll say if you don’t go, stay at home. Don’t focus so much on trying to get other people to like you, it’s draining and will never work.
  13. Spend some alone time- It can be in your dorm room, on a park bench, or at a table outside of the coffee shop, but be comfortable being alone. There’s beauty in being able to appreciate your own company. I would always spend the hour of downtime I had between my two morning classes my senior year, outside of the coffee shop on campus. I would sit on a table and work on homework, or drink coffee and people watch, but I loved it so much.
  14. Focus on you- At the end of the day you matter the most. You’re the one earning the degree, you’re the one paying for school, and you’re the one that’s going to have all of these memories. Do whatever you want to do. Study the degree that you want to study, spend time with whoever you want to spend time with, and don’t hold back. These are your four years and your time to grow and prepare for life.

College goes by so fast. So incredibly fast. Make the best out of it and cherish everything. Remember the walk to and from your classes, the smell of the morning, and the way campus looks in the fall. Remember it all and cherish it.

Thanks for letting me flash back to college.