I came in like a wrecking ball.

I am very type A.

I know I’ve mentioned it over and over again but that’s because it’s true.

Have you ever seen that episode of friends where everyone gives Monica a hard time about leaving a pair of shoes out? She lays in bed at night and can’t sleep because she wants nothing more than to move the shoes where they’re supposed to be.

She even considers moving them and getting up early before everyone else and moving them back?

Hi, hello, it’s me…I’m Monica.

I like to have everything figured out, planned out, and color coded. Some may say that I’m being a “control freak” but it honestly makes my soul so happy.

I’ll happily wear a “hello my name is control freak” name tag.

I came in real hot for the start of this year. I had wanted to do all of the things. Seriously.

There were so many things that I wanted to do and it was so overwhelming.

I even changed my word for the year because it was stressing me out. I had to admit that I was wrong and take a step back. I was forced to take just a few things to work on this year that were the most important to me.

You see..it’s okay to want to do so many things..but that stuff gets to me. My favorite quote is “you can do anything but not everything” and it hits home for me so hard.

I find myself getting caught up in this idea that I need to do A, B, and C…and D, E, F, and G for good measure. If I don’t do everything that I’ve set out to do, I am a failure.

It was January 1st and I was already stressed out from all of my goals this year.

I talked to my husband and told him I was overwhelmed, that I could already see myself just hating all of these things that I wanted to do so bad. He asked me what I wanted to do the most and to focus on those things.

So that’s what I decided to do.

I changed my word, made a new vision board, wrote out a new workout routine and set out to have the best year ever.

The first full week of 2020 was amazing. I had prepped these amazing lunches for work with the help of my dad and his amazing cooking skills, I was crushing my workouts, and I was going to bed after reading a chapter of a book. All things that made my heart happy.

I had even started to write down what I was thankful every morning. I purchased a journal and every morning as I drank my pre-workout I would write down what I was grateful for and my intention for the day.

I was seriously killing it.

Until Sunday January 12th happened.

I woke up with a sore throat and it progressed as the day came to a close. Monday morning rolled around and I had to call out sick for work, and for Tuesday as well. I tried to go in on Wednesday but only made it half of the day. I couldn’t even go in on Thursday. Friday finally came around and I was able to drag myself out of bed and go to work.

I was so frustrated.

I had let myself down.

The week before went so well! I was positive, motivated, and ready to crush anything that came my way.

So why was everything completely turned upside down the very next week?

I have only done a handful of workouts since getting sick, I haven’t read my book all but a few times, and I haven’t written in my gratitude journal since the day I got sick.

Why am I giving up?

Why do I have to force myself out of bed when just a couple of weeks ago I hopped out of bed ready for the day?

I have been feeling so off since I got sick, and I am at the point where I realize it and I’m not happy with it. I’m ready to be the version of me that started out the new year strong.

Whenever I’m feeling off I read some of my best friends old blog posts. I can’t explain why, but they make me remember why I started writing. They remind me that I use to just write to write. That I wasn’t trying to make a post that people would “want” to read. That I wasn’t trying to come up with fluff pieces because that’s what everyone else was doing. That I love writing because it’s my outlet, it brings me happiness. I want my blog to get back to that. To be my happy place.

I took this from my best friends blog today and I’m going to use it as motivation for the rest of the week.

This morning, I could have hit snooze. I could have rolled back over, spent my morning off cozy in bed without the worry of an alarm. This morning I chose love. I chose to get my butt out of bed, hit the yoga studio, then hit the trail for some miles before the sun came up. This morning, like many others I chose to start my day off with something I love. And I am happier because of it.

It’s crazy how something she wrote on February 15th 2017 can be so incredibly relevant to me now almost three years later.

So here I am saying I’m going to snap out of this funk and get back to being me. The me that I love and the me that gets stuff done.

As far as my blog goes? Expect more posts like this. More posts talking about things that I love, things that are hard, and me trying new things. I turn 30 this year, and I won’t do it quietly.

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My word.

Hey blog, long time no see!

It’s been quite some time since I wrote a blog post and updated anyone on anything.

I was a little busy chasing my dreams, dreams that I accomplished.

I wrote my book!

The one thing I set out for myself to do in 2019.

It was extremely time consuming and I would be lying if I said it was easy.

I definitely argued with myself numerous times over anything and everything. From the title of the book to trying to figure out how many pages I could get, it was so incredibly stressful.

I’ll save the book writing process for another blog post.

I wanted to hop back on because today is new years eve, and I love new years eve.

Setting goals for the new year, aspiring to do more, chasing after my dreams.

I love the fresh start.

If you go back to some of my earlier new year’s posts, you’ll see that I had resolutions.

I usually had 10 resolutions that I would make, and chances were things wouldn’t always work out.

I would spend some time working on one resolution and ignore the rest.

Or maybe I would put all of my energy on one resolution and do nothing with the others.

It wasn’t very balanced and the resolutions weren’t attainable as a whole.

I realized this when I made resolutions for 2018 and only went through with a couple of them. I ended the year disappointed and far from hopeful for the upcoming year.

It wasn’t until I had seen people coming up with words instead of resolutions that I gained a little bit of hope.

It was a different approach to something that I loved doing, so why not give it a shot?

I went after a word that would motivate me. A word that would push me outside of my comfort zone and to allow me to stop making excuses.

I had wanted to write a book for so long and I kept making excuses as to why I couldn’t do it.

Until 2019.

I decided that this was the year I was going to pursue my goals.

Pursue.

The word that helped guide me through 2019.

This word was stuck in my head all throughout the year.

This word was always at the forefront of everything I was doing.

From pursuing my book to pursuing help with my mental health.

2019 was my strongest year yet.

Yes, I doubted myself.

Yes, I went from the lowest of lows to the highest of highs.

I went after things that scared me and things that pushed me more than I ever thought possible.

I knew after just a couple of months into this year, that I was going to keep picking words for the year and not resolutions.

Not that anything’s wrong with resolutions, I think anything that pushes you to do more with your life is great.

I just found that words work better for me.

A simple word that kept me doing everything with an intention.

Whatever it was that I was doing, I was always pursuing more.

If something scared me or was going to make me uncomfortable, I reminded myself to pursue it.

No matter what happened this word was always there.

I decided to pick a word this year that would do the same thing.

A word that, no matter what, would remind me to do more.

A word that would push me outside of my comfort zone and remind me of my goals.

Create.

The goals I have this year are big, they scare me, but that’s a good thing.

The goals that I have can’t be accomplished until I create more.

I want to create more happy habits.

Create daily gratitude and intention habits.

Create my next book.

Create more around this blog and myself.

Create something that can help others.

Create.

This word will remind me to always do more when I feel like not doing anything.

To get outside of my comfort zone because good things can come from outside of it.

That I can do absolutely anything I want to do, regardless of the fear of judgments from others.

I always said growing up that I wasn’t creative. I just took it and went with it.

I don’t want that to be my excuse anymore. I want to take the things that scare me and run with them.

Do more with them.

I’m excited for this year.

I’m excited for my word.

I’m turning 30 this year, and I want to enter my thirties as the best version of myself.

I’m excited to see what this year brings.

My blog is officially back up and I have so many things on the horizon.

The podcast I started this year with my sister is going strong.

I’ll be starting my second book.

I’m creating a weekly newsletter for anyone who wants to participate in it.

I want to grow more and create more in every aspect of my life.

Make sure to stick around and join me for this journey.

The name of this blog is “Beyond Twenty Something” and I will continue to keep it as that.

Because I am so much more than a twenty something who’s entering the next decade in her life.

I am beyond twenty something.

30.

create

 

Halfway through 2019.

Hey! It’s me!

Long time no talk!

I haven’t seen you since December 8th 2018.

How have you been?

This year has been amazing so far, and I haven’t blogged about any of it.

I turned 29.

Started a podcast with my sister.

Watched my athlete take 3rd at the state meet in the 110 meter hurdles.

Visited Disneyland and Harry Potter world with my family.

I would be lying if I said that I didn’t miss it, because I do, but I don’t miss how much pressure I put on myself to write blog posts and make them as perfect as I could.

I put a lot of pressure on myself with everything I do, and my blog is no exception.

It would lead to poorly written, or forced blog posts that I wasn’t proud of. I loved it when I first started blogging, but hated it towards the end.

It became a chore.

The one outlet that I had made for myself was becoming a chore.

It was also taking time away from the one goal that I had for myself.

The one thing that lit my soul on fire just at the thought of.

I wanted to write this book so bad.

I just kept telling myself that I didn’t have time, and honestly, I really didn’t have a lot of time.

Between being a mom, wife, daughter, coach, and full time employee there wasn’t much time.

I just made time.

You know that feeling?

When you want something so badly that you’ll do anything to get it?

That was me.

I knew that I had to write this book this year.

I knew that it would mean getting to bed a little later and waking up a little earlier.

That I would have to stay off of Netflix and write instead.

Which if you know me, is extremely difficult.

Quitting blogging helped. In fact, if I hadn’t stopped I honestly don’t think I could have done it.

It wasn’t a perfect process though.

It was hard.

There wasn’t a single day while writing my book that I didn’t worry.

I worried that no one besides my immediate family would read it.

I worried that it would be awful.

I worried that I couldn’t do it.

I wish I could tell you that something just clicked and reminded me of my goals.

Or that I had some life changing event that made me push through the negative thoughts.

But I didn’t.

I just kept going.

I listened to those negative thoughts, realized that my fears were real and fine to feel, and kept going anyways.

That’s the thing about fears, others peoples opinions, and negative thoughts.

They don’t go away.

Maybe some of them do eventually, or a large majority of them if you’re lucky, but they’re always there.

Don’t let anyone fool you, there’s no magic cure for it.

You just have to keep going.

I realized recently that fears aren’t always bad.

Worries and negative thoughts aren’t the end all.

They don’t mean that you’re broken.

They’re there to challenge you.

To remind you to keep fighting.

I was reminded of that this May.

To fight, and to always keep fighting.

From a really good talk with a really good person.

And I kept that with me throughout the end of June, when I finally finished my book, rough draft and all.

I definitely grew throughout the entire process.

Going back and reading chapters I can see how my thoughts evolved and grew the more I wrote.

It was one of the scariest and most rewarding things that I have ever done.

Going towards the directions of my dreams, regardless of the fears that surrounded the path to it.

I turn 30 this year.

Well not this exact year but my next birthday on February 8th 2020.

I’ll be 30.

I wanted to make this last year in my twenties a special one.

A way to reflect on the last ten years of my life.

Ten years that completely rocked my world.

Ten years that taught me every single lesson I could possibly think of.

With the help of my grandma and some inspiration from the very first blog post I ever wrote, I did just that.

Reflected on the last ten years.

I decided to write a book about the twenty lessons that I learned in my twenties , lessons that turned me into the person I am today.

Someone who broke a heart, found love, had cancer, dreamed big, and learned how to be a friend.

This book is my entire heart.

Literally.

It’s all in that binder that my sweet husband is currently going through editing.

It’s scary though.

He’s reading what I wrote.

He could hate it.

He could love it.

It’s officially out in the universe to someone.

I said back in December that I would share what it was about when it’s done so here it is.

This is normally where I would say something like “you may not care” or “if anyone even reads it” but it’s time I start accepting my accomplishments and taking pride in them.

I’ve written this book that I’m extremely proud of and it’s very special to me.

You’ll have your hands on it sometime in the fall, so get excited.

I quit.

 

I’m quitting.

You may care.

Or you may not.

But I’ve decided to quit blogging.

Sort of.

It was one of my resolutions for 2018 to start my book.

I’ve talked about it a handful of times on this blog.

But it’s my biggest life goal.

(Besides visiting every major league baseball stadium)

This whole “Blog to 2019” challenge felt very forced this year.

That should have been my first sign.

I had trouble coming up with blog post ideas.

And when I did, I didn’t want to do any of the ones I came up with.

Except the ones that were posted so far.

Those were all special to me and I wanted to do them.

They weren’t supposed to go up until later this month, but I wanted to write them.

I made a decision to follow through and post those ones but quit after.

And that’s what this post is.

It’s my notice that I’m quitting.

I interviewed my grandma last week.

When I asked her what she wanted from me in life, she said she wanted me to write my book.

It hit me.

Hard.

Despite what I want to think, my grandparents won’t be around forever.

And if she wants me to write this book.

I’m writing this book.

So she can read it.

I’ve had one idea in my mind for awhile.

Then another.

And a third idea.

I never told anyone those ideas.

When interviewing my grandma I mentioned that I had a few ideas floating around and she said something that I’m not going to repeat.

She said something that gave me my final idea.

She inspired the theme of this book.

And I won’t tell anyone.

No one knows except me.

And it’s going to stay that way until it’s done.

If she remembers what she said, my grandma might know too.

I’m going to be stopping this blog challenge early to write my book.

I’ll keep writing for my blog.

But they’re going to be monthly book writing updates.

That’s about it.

I have a strict timeline in my mind and I have to get to work.

Sorry if I let anyone down.

If anyone cares.

But it’s whats going to happen.

I’ve made a “word” for the year.

A word that I’m going to live by, and a word that’s going to help me reach my goals.

And that word is pursue.

I’m going to be 30 in a little more than a year.

And that’s crazy to me.

I only have one more year of being a twenty something and I need to make it count.

This blog made me so comfortable with writing.

It made me never want to stop.

I can’t believe that people like reading it and care enough to keep reading it.

I hope you’ll read my book too.

I’ll update everyone on here as my book comes.

This blog won’t go away, it’ll just be taking a mini vacation.

I don’t want to completely disappear from it without an explanation.

So here it is.

I’m quitting my blog to pursue my dreams.

Bye for now. ❤

2018 Resolutions Review

I’m posting my resolutions reflection post a little early this year.

You’ll find out why tomorrow.

For the last two years I’ve written New Years Resolutions and try my hardest to accomplish them.

I’ve found that writing them and putting them out into the universe holds me accountable.

It reminds me every day of the things I sat out to pursue for the upcoming year.

I made some tough ones last year, but worked so hard to try and make them happen.

2018 New Years Resolutions.

Run another half marathon– This one was hard. I trained my butt off. I worked hard all winter, spring, and summer. I really wanted to run this half marathon near Portland on the fourth of July. I started out so fast and was really pumped for the race. It wasn’t until mile 7 or so when I started getting dizzy. I really thought about quitting, and honestly, I probably should have. I finished along side some strangers who passed me along to my sister and husband to finish. I spent the next hour in a medical tent. It definitely wasn’t my favorite experience of the year, but it made me really appreciate how hard I worked. It made me realize that no matter how hard you try and prepare for something, it might not always work out. And that’s ok.

Take a road trip- I accomplished this one during March of this last year. My little family took a road trip to Seattle. We got a cute little house and spent the weekend exploring the city. It was so much fun and Ian did so well experiencing new things. It turned out that would be the first of three times I would visit Seattle this year, and I loved every single trip.

Watch 52 Movies- Ok…I suck at watching movies…we all know this now. It turns out that I don’t have as much time as I thought I did to watch 52 new movies. In fact, I think I might have only watched 20 or less. I definitely found some new favorites, but also found that there were others things I would rather be doing. Some of the ones I really enjoyed were; When Harry Met Sally, Sleepless in Seattle, Top Gun, and Dead Poets Society. My favorite though, was Shawshank Redemption, if you haven’t seen it you need to!

Work on my patience- This one is hard. How do you track ones patience? I’ve found that when I’m aware of what’s going on, I’m better with my patience. But in the heat of the moment I definitely air on the side of impatient.

Learn something new- Here’s where we get a little out there. This resolution kept nagging me all year. “Megan….you better be learning something new!” Honestly I kept trying to force myself to learn something and it never stuck. It’s when I randomly stumbled down a horoscope website that I started researching more and more into my horoscope. And not just that, different signs such as your moon and sun sign, along with your birth chart. In no way do I live by any of this, I just decided to start looking into it all and I think it’s insanely accurate and fascinating.

Daily Gratitude- If I had to grade myself on daily gratitude I’d give myself a C. I’m 50/50 when it comes to writing down things I’m thankful for. Not that I’m not grateful for things, I just have a hard time taking the time to write it all down.

Save Money- Again, I would give myself a C for this one. Did I save money? Kind of. Did I go crazy and buy random crap that I didn’t need? Not really.

Be Spontaneous- This one is the resolution that I’m the most proud of. I had been wanting to visit my best friend in Missouri since she moved a few years back. But you see..I hate flying. Just the thought of it terrifies me. I was having a bad couple of days and really just needed something good to happen. I texted my husband, looked at her work schedule, and next thing you know I’m booking a flight to St. Louis. Probably one of my top three moments of the year and one of my favorite decisions.

Start to write my book- See tomorrow’s post.

Don’t be so hard on myself- This will forever be a work in progress for me. I tend to be a people pleaser, and want to make everyone happy. I tend to be hard on myself if people aren’t happy with me. Which is so messed up if you think about it. Just because someone else has randomly decided that they are upset with me or don’t like me, unless I have done something wrong, that’s their issue not mine. This was a constant struggle all year and will be for awhile. But i’m trying.

2018 was a great. Just like the previous years.

But next year needs to be different.

Next year will be different.

It’s the year I turn 29.

The last year before 30.

It’s going to be a big one.

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The Best Relationship Advice.

I don’t think I ever went to my parents for relationship advice.

Okay, that’s a lie.

I remember asking them how to break up with someone once.

I would usually tell my mom when I liked someone but it was still hard for me.

I know I know..

Hard to imagine that my parents also dated growing up.

That they too had failed relationships that they learned from.

And a marriage that’s going to celebrate 30 years this month.

When asking for any advice to be answered on my blog this question came up.

Relationship advice.

Very broad but I was excited about the idea of it.

I have been in some failed relationships, and a very successful one for five and a half years now.

But I wasn’t fully convinced that I could give the best relationship advice.

I mean I can.

And I will.

But I know two people who could also give some pretty good relationship advice.

My parents were lucky.

They knew pretty soon into their relationship that they wanted to get married.

They were only 20 and 21 when they said “I do.”

And they’re still going strong 30 years later.

Are relationships easy?

No.

But my parents have shown me time and time again what love and a good family can look like and do for you.

I decided to ask them to come up with some relationship advice for my blog.

I thought it would be fun to get advice from a couple I admire.

So if you dread the idea of asking your parents for relationship advice, or want some words of wisdom from me and my awesome parents, keep reading.

Advice from my dad.

Marry your best friend.

Say “I love you as much as you can, every day.”

Laugh and have fun together.

Compliment each other as much as you can. 

Look forward and be excited to see your partner.

Laugh and cry together.

Advice from my mom.

Always say I love you when you leave for work, during the day, after work, and especially before bed.

Even if you don’t agree on something, always tell your partner you love them anyways.

Work as a team, especially with kids.

Communication.

Always listen.

Honesty.

Advice from me.

Laugh as much as you can with each other.

Be with someone you can’t imagine life without.

Never change who you are.

Love will come when you stop looking for it.

Make time for each other.

Say I love you before bed.

I’m going to end this with my favorite piece of advice from my mom.

It was from one of my first blog posts.

I was mad at the world after I got dumped by my college boyfriend.

I was so concerned with what could happen next.

With who would love me or if I would even find love.

My mom said to me, “Before you can love someone else, you have to love yourself.”

And to this day it’s my favorite piece of advice.

The second you stop looking for love and spend time learning to love yourself.

It will come.

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An Interview with my Grandma.

Today’s blog post will be a little different.

In thinking of different things to write about for this month I decided to switch it up.

I don’t think people my age talk to their grandparents enough.

Myself included.

Visits for holidays don’t count.

We need to talk to them more.

Learn about them.

Ask them questions.

They created our family, and without them we wouldn’t exist.

To this day one of my biggest regrets is not asking my grandpa more questions.

For Christmas a couple of years ago, I gave one of my grandmas a book.

More like a journal.

In it I wrote out different questions.

Questions about herself.

Questions about her childhood.

Adulthood.

Life with my grandpa.

Life with my mom.

Every question had a few pages for her answers.

And I asked for it back when she’s done.

That way I can forever have it.

I loved the idea and it will always be one of my favorite gifts given.

I realized the other day that I never gave my other grandma this opportunity, so I decided to turn it into a post.

I wanted to ask her questions to get to know her more.

I obviously know my grandma.

I spent so much of my childhood with her.

I idolized her.

She introduced me to coffee, country music, and day time television.

I spent most days after school at her house growing up.

Until I got old enough to do after school sports.

I wrote up a list of questions and sat down with my grandma and asked them to her.

She knew it was going to be for a post and loved the idea.

We didn’t just talk about the answers to my questions. We talked about so many different things.

And it was so nice.

So here it is, and I hope you enjoy it.

My interview with my grandma. ❤

Me: What’s your full name? And why were you given that name?
Grandma: Betty Lee Everetts, and I was told growing up that I was named after the Betsy Lee Mine since I was born in Montana.

Me: Do you remember the day my dad was born?
Grandma: Not a lot, it was a long time ago. I remember being in a lot of pain.

Me: Do you have any regrets?
Grandma: I wish I could have finished school. I only went to school until I was 12, my dad wouldn’t let me go to school after that. I had to work.

Me: What are you most proud of?
Grandma: My kids.

Me: If you could change one thing about the world today what would it be?
Grandma: I wish people would get off of their phones. Every time you get together people are always on them, I wish they were never invented.

Me: What do you want for me in life?
Grandma: I really want you to write your book.

Me: What was I like as a kid?
Grandma: Oh my gosh you and Janelle would talk so fast, I always had to ask what you were talking about! Half the time I couldn’t understand you two.

Me: What was your childhood like?
Grandma: We really didn’t have much money. For Christmas each year I would get the same doll just in a different dress. By the time I left home there were 12 of us all living under the same roof.

Me: When you were in school, what subjects did you enjoy?
Grandma: I really liked math.

Me: Did you have any pets growing up?
Grandma: I had a black curly haired dog, but I can’t remember it’s name.
Me: My dad said you guys had a turkey when he was little?
Grandma: Oh yeah we had that turkey! We also had two cats when you were little, Sugar Ray and Boomer. *Best cats ever*

Me: What big events in History do you remember?
Grandma: I remember when President Kennedy got shot. We were living in Aumsville, I was pregnant. I was watching TV and saw it happen. I ran and told Grandpa and he didn’t believe me.

Me: What’s the most rewarding thing about getting older?
Grandma: That I can still function, but not as much as I want to. That I still have my mind.

Me: What was your favorite show growing up?
Grandma: Well we didn’t have tv growing up..
Me: Duh Megan
Grandma: I loved listening to radio shows like The Shadow and Nick Carter. But now I love watching what’s left of my soap operas.

Me: What’s your favorite color?
Grandma: Green

Me: Favorite flower?
Grandma: Tulips

Me: Favorite food?
Grandma: Everything.
*Woman after my own heart.*

Me: Who was your favorite singer/actor?
Grandma: Elvis, Johnny Cash, Debbie Reynolds, Jane Powell, Elizabeth Taylor.

In interviewing my grandma I found out the most fascinating thing..

That she lived in New York.

I had no idea.

Maybe I did, but I really don’t think so.

My grandma left home when she was 19. She said her dad told her that only rich people lived in New York so she wanted to live in New York. She lived there for a little less than a year.

My grandma lived in Oklahoma, New York, California, and finally in Oregon.

It was actually on a greyhound in the middle of her travels where she met my grandpa.

Now this part I knew.

Being the persistent man that he was, he wouldn’t stop talking to her until she gave him her contact information.

While she was in New York she decided to move to California with her friend.

Her friend came down with the flu while she was there and she needed a new place to live.

That’s where my grandpa called her and said “hey want to move in with me and get married?”

She thought..sure why not.

And that’s how a marriage that lasted 53 years started.

My grandma is a strong person.

One of the strongest I know.

She may not like it, but my nickname for her is “crazy.”

It’s the perfect description of her.

She’s so full energy and spunk.

She’ll tell you how it is and maybe not what you want to hear.

But she’ll always tell you what she’s thinking.

She loves her family so much and is very independent.

I hope you all enjoyed this and I hope she does as well.

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